Comments:
Chris - 2005-06-08 16:56:25
So sorry, hon. And I know how it feels. You WILL be ready someday, and it is foolish to try to force yourself to feel that before you are ready. And yes, it does stink to be Richard. Honestly, I can say that I've been in his place... liking a guy who is still hung up over someone. And granted, yeah, it's not his fault or my fault or anyone's fault, it is still fair to recognize when you're not ready and kinda let that person know what their options are. Best of luck, I'll be reading =) **HUGS!!**
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Lisa - 2005-06-08 16:56:51
Hey girl! You are in my thoughts! And we can't wait to see you whenever you manage to head this way! My munchkins are growing SO SO fast! Just hang in there, you know I am thinking about you! ♥
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Kevin (The Ex Husband aka: Asshole) - 2005-07-13 06:10:32
Hi. I forget exactly where I got this link from, but since I do have it, I thought I'd look in on you from time to time. You see, where I always had issues with our situation, was in those instances where I was told that I didn't care and that I was an "asshole". What's funny is you care enough to even call me an "asshole" in your online diary (blog). Usually I tell people we were too young, when speaking of our marital demise. I also don't go as far as to call names or the like. But I'm the "asshole" that kept you from ingesting that whole bottle of pills - twice in a three month period, while attempting to put us on the path that I am now on. As you always said I am calculating to a fault. That being said, I succeeded in getting the opportunity to become a Marine Officer. Success means a great deal to me but you never forget those who have played integral roles in it (especially those who you pray for who still insist upon bashing you), so for all of the things that I dealt with as a junior enlisted Marine in a time of war, I thank you. If it wasn't for the struggles that I had with you: two suicide attempts before I made it back to active duty (both of which still haunt me to this day - partially why I haven't been "Close" to anyone since you), bouncing back from $9600+, a very messy divorce all while earning numerous awards and accolades along the way(because work was theraputic). It took lots of hard work and two years of driving everynight after work alone into the wee hours of the morning (my idea of therapy) but I did it. My mother still asks about you (because unlike my father she knew where my heart really was), and still has the clock that you bought her for Mothers Day 2000 (center of the mantle right over the fireplace). When I see her she always asks if I have any regrets. I tell her NO everytime. We had our good times and we had our bad. I made the decision that was difficult (and did everything in my power to get you to hate me and move on) to ensure my ability to support a family if and when that opportunity ever came (something that I will definitely be able to do). I can truthfully say that I watched the things my mother had to endure during 16 years of my father's Naval career. It takes it's toll, and on the end of my time at this duty station, I don't think you would have made it 6 months (because my schedule didn't change much from the time that I left until now). I loved you and many of the things I did were to not to have to watch you hurt yourself because of me (because I was/am focused on my career). Don't let the things done in youth and immaturity consume you (you still harbor ill will toward me - a waste of energy - thats noted at least three times in what I have read). I wish you the best in all endeavours that you may undertake in your lifes journey. Love Always.
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Kathy - 2005-07-13 06:25:10
Hi. um, I don't know you, I just wanted to say that from what I read from your entry, and by what I read above that I think we may have a lot in common. I am not divorced, but am separated. My husband left me in November-he couldn't see me destroy myself anymore... Anyway you just sound so much like me in some ways. I think there is definitely no time limit in relationships or finding them. Just be happy and take as much time as you feel that you need. Take care! xoxox Kathy
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Richard - 2005-10-28 17:48:30
Nikki and I have a very strong relationship now.
However... you're now able to read what was going on in MY head at the time.
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